“I think my boyfriend is gay.” Has this thought even come across your mind? Imagine you have been dating a guy for months and feel head over heels for him. He has been different and unique in so many ways, but you never could realize what was so different about him. And then one day your best friend tells that your boyfriend shows signs of a gay man in the closet. Gay boyfriend !!! Your whole world would come crashing down and you would then look at the past and try to judge each moment, every behavior, excuses he made and the choices he made. You realize that your boyfriend shows signs of a closeted gay. And then you feel so silly of not noticing these signs earlier although you have spent almost every single day in the past 6 months with him.
The next time you look out for a relationship, the first thing that would strike your mind is what if he is gay. Do you know what percentage of people are gay? Hope you don’t hit any of the gay men out there. But studies show that a large percentage of men are homosexual. How to tell if a guy is gay? Are there peculiar signs of homosexuality in men ?
Here are the signs that most likely indicate that you have a straight up gay boyfriend.
1. Wandering eyes
Just like straight boyfriends checkout other girls, gay men checkout other guys. If you noticed him doing that before, you would have shrugged it off thinking he was admiring the shoe brand or noticing the leather jacket. But you were wrong, his eyes were checking out another handsome dude. Look for those wandering eyes as a sign of gaydar. If he makes long eye contacts with another man, it is a good indication of a gay boyfriend.
2. Bathroom rituals
It may be old fashioned to say so, but the reality is gay men take more time to dress up than straight men. If he takes hours to get ready in the bathroom, that could be a hint. If he has much more toiletries than you, he is taking good care of himself. Really? Men with so much importance to hygiene, doesn’t sound usual. You are perhaps dealing with a gay boyfriend.
3. Freaky fantasies
Having sexual fantasies is fun and healthy. But does he fantasy you having threesome and the third person is always a guy. If that is what he fantasies about, then chances are that he is sexually aroused by another man. See such requests on having a threesome as a warning sign for a gay boyfriend.
4. Flirtatious with guys
Girls usually flirt with each other. They can be very sweet and that can be strictly straight platonic fun. However straight guys do not flirt with each other. Straight men never compliment each other in a flirtatious way. If you man is flirting with other man, you may suspect him to be gay. Gay flirting signs are very obvious and your gay boyfriend cannot hide them from you for long. Stay alert when you see these gaydar signs.
5. Flock Game
You would have heard of the saying – birds of a feather flock together. This is genuinely true when it comes to homosexuals. If a straight guy is into football, a lot of his male friends would be football fans as well. If the guy is into adventure sports, a lot of his male friend would be the one who love adventure sports. In the exact same fashion, if your boyfriend has a lot of gay males as friends, chances are that he himself is gay too. Take that as a very important sign. Closeted gay always flock together.
6. Expensive gifts
As much as it is normal for girls to give expensive gifts to each other, guys are too bad at treating each other with gifts. Guys don’t gift much, let alone expensive gifts like electronics or vacations. If you boyfriend is giving gifts to his male friend/s, you may want to think that he likes his friends and hence he is gifting them. The reality is whether it is man-woman or man-man relationship, all a guy is trying to do is woo someone into bed. That is when the gift giving starts and it doesn’t matter if that is to get a male friend.
7. Night outs
If your boyfriend hangs out with one of his buddies a lot and then does not return the night because he is too high to drive and crashes at his apartment, you should be curious. Even more if your boyfriend is not an adventure kind of person and all of a sudden he does things that keeps him away on a weekend night, chances are that you have a gay boyfriend. All of that hiking and camping is a way to get away from you and be with his male interest.
8. No sex
Is your boyfriend showing no interest in initiating sex with you? If you trigger the topic he gives excuses of being tired or having a headache or wanting to wake up early for a morning meeting. Does he show no passion when you dress up in sexy lingerie or get some sex toys to play with together? A healthy straight male would find it very difficult to say no to sex. If you boyfriend is saying no, a very good reason is that he’s sexually attracted to men.
9. On phone
Is your man, constantly on phone with a coworker? Is it that he is spending too much time on and off work hours? Does he giggle over the phone a lot when talking to him? Is he smiling too much or feeling shy. Do you see him responding less and listen more when you are around? Is he often stepping out to take the call if you are around? Do the conversations go for hours? Does he ALWAYS call or text someone before he hits the bed? If you see all these signs, they are sure to hint that you are dating a gay closeted male.
10. You don’t meet his friends
Do you know most of his girl and guy friends, except this one friend with whom he speaks a ton? Is he trying to keep his friend away from you with whom he has been spending weekends or hangs out after work? If he is trying to keep someone away, the reason could be that he is scared that you would know the truth.
11. When high
Keeping your inhibitions and secrets in control after a few glasses of alcohol would sound really difficult. When he gets high, does he ask you to dare him to go and talk to a guy and ask him out? Does he flirt with other males in a party after a few drinks? The truth comes out when he is high. So if he behaves weird after he is high… hola ! You got to keep an eye as you may be dating a gay man.
12. Homosexuality prohibited
If you ever bring up a topic of homosexuality, your gay boyfriend would always want to change the topic or not be part of that discussion. He would not want to give his opinion on the topic, or watch a gay movie with you. You will see no reaction from him to any man dating a man or two men marrying even if it’s in your close friend circle or family. He would avoid giving an opinion due to the fear that if he supports it, his truth would be known. Homosexuality would be a sensitive thing to talk about with any homophobic, hence, the best thing to do is avoid talking about it.
13. Just ‘Nothing’
Have you ever faced the scenario that your boyfriend is chatting with his friend and the moment you step into the room they stop the conversation? If you ask them what was going on, they would just say ‘nothing’. You would hear ‘nothing’ when he would be texting someone and smiling. He would say ‘nothing’ when he would be having long talks and laughs over the phone on something. Pretty much ‘nothing’ is surely ‘something’.
14. Attention seeker
Have you noticed your boyfriend showing off his moves in a pub on the dance floor? Has he been looking around to find the best guy in the pub? He would do the same at a beach. He would show off his abs and his eyes would wander to look for some hunk who is interested in him. Grabbing attention of other guys means the same to gay men as grabbing attention of females’ means to straight guys.
15. Gay Porn
Straight men and women watch gay porn. That’s just because they are curious and it’s a sign of fantasy. They do it once a while. However, if your boyfriend has been watching gay porn for hours and hours, that’s not just curiosity, that’s getting off. If that’s how he gets excited, lady you are on the wrong side. You probably are dealing with a gay boyfriend.
16. A** Play
Most straight men would like to do the fingering and penetrating. They dislike being on the receiving end. However, if your boyfriend wants you to play with his ass, (let alone use your dildo on him) that’s a pretty good indicator that he may like the real thing even more.
17. His Idols
Men with over the top lifestyle have a lot of gay men followers. If your man loves divas or watching men who “came out” about their orientation or has books that are about gay men, chances are that they are idolizing them. And needless to say they feel gay and hence idolize other gay people?
18. Favorite shows
Shows and TVs seem to be a stereotype indication for sexuality, but it always seems to be true. When alone, they would follow lifestyle programs of gay celebrities. With you, they would watch shows related to beauty. They will follow over the top shows such as Grammys or Paris fashion week.
19. Delete history
If you and your boyfriend share a common electronic device, they would almost always make sure that they delete the history in browsers, You Tube, Netflix, Amazon. Wiping all traces of what they have been watching or searching for. Sounds familiar?
20. Gym & Parlor
Taking care of body is good. But if he is over obsessive about how he looks, and spends extraordinary amount of time and money in gym and parlor, which is a hint that he wants to look good for ‘someone’. Furthermore, he wants to maintain how he looks in aspiration of a potential relationship.
21. Public Toilet
Most people are comfortable using their own toilets only. However, in situations we all use public toilets. Gay men do not want to use public toilets. That is just because they are not comfortable with their sexuality and would rather go home than to use the public toilet if given a choice. This holds good for most girls. They do not want to use public toilets either.
22. His View
He will dread from giving his views on homosexuality. If the topic comes up in a group of friends who are straight, he will listen what everyone has to say to understand what they think and how they will react to his sexuality when the time comes.
Gay men, when playing a video game would often pick a hunky male or a female character. The reason is unknown, but psychologically proven to be true!
A straight man would choose from a range of men as a character while the gay man would stick to his character. Watch the gaming habits and avatars he picks when playing.
Gay men are very stylish and fashionable. Therefore they have a good knowledge of what is going on in the fashion industry and what is the ‘in’ thing. Listen to how he compliments you. Does he tell you that you look beautiful or that leather jacket with skinny jeans looks very sexy? Does he give you suggestion to wear those high heel boots or to put on a neon nail varnish?
25. His Profile
Does he have a secret online profile? Is if MySpace full of men who he doesn’t know personally. Does he have new friend who have revealing or sexy pictures? Most men in closet are themselves on social networking site. If he has a fake online profile, that is a bigger hint. If your man is on all these homosexual dating sites, maybe you have a gay boyfriend.
Finally, there are only tips will indicate how to tell if a guy is gay. If your boyfriend has one of these, do not take him as gay. But if he has a majority of these signs, you should definitely question – “Is my boyfriend gay?”. These signs are universal for gay men. Are there any other gay signs you know? Share with us.